A visual essay of logos for women’s health/support/lifestyle type groups. (via Consumerist)

Here’s what I learned about women:

• Women like to dance.
• When women dance, they like to raise their arms above their head.  This is very useful when YMCA is playing.
• Women have long, flowing hair.
• Women often have to jump over things.
• Women like to tip-toe.
• Women like pastels.
• Women raise their hands & wait to be called on.
• Women like to hug.
• Women live in Florida & Nebraska.
• Women have vaginas. And big hips.
• Women sprout trees from their arms or head.
• Women like hearts & flowers & affirmations.

I hate this woman shit.  Where’s the logo for the woman with piercings in her face & tattoos, who drinks whiskey & curses?  Which of you broads wants to join my support group?  We’re not Earth goddesses, we’re not gonna dance & hug & celebrate our vaginas (although they’re awesome, don’t get me wrong).  It’s ok if your hair is short – mine is too.  We’re not going to turn into trees or get in tune with the lunar cycles.  We will not ovulate together.

What the fuck does our logo look like?

Great article from the AV Club Chicago on Block 37. I’d compare this place to the mall in Dawn of the Dead, but it’s not popular enough. I think of zombies as having higher standards that this place.

Lowell High School in San Francisco.  This makes me tear up a little.

Or you can get down like the frat boys at the University of Chicago.

Those of you not living under a rock already know about the guy in Florida planning on burning the Quran.  There’s a lot of counter-protests planned, including one from the American Library Association.  ALA has a pretty impressive track record regarding 1st Amendment rights, but they’re making a bad call here.

They’re planning a reading of the Quran on Saturday, which is great.  What’s not so great is that they’re calling it “Fighting Fire with Free Speech“.  Repellent as it is, burning the Quran is as much free speech as reading aloud from it.

Free speech doesn’t just apply to things that are pleasant.  It doesn’t apply only to good manners.  If this was a city trying to ban a book about burning the Quran, ALA would be all over it.

The Quran reading is a fantastic idea.  But call it “A Day of Diversity” or “Feelin’ the Love.”  ALA has no problem coming up with themes that sound vaguely juvenile.  Now’s the time for one.*

Framing this as an “ALA defends free speech issue” makes it sound like Reverend Jones is somehow acting outside the bounds of the 1st Amendment.  But the opposite of hate speech isn’t free speech.  They’re both free speech.  ALA knows better.

* Edited to add: How about calling it “Learn what the Quran actually says?” It’s a fantastic idea to have a reading. Expose people to something new, help them learn, provide access to knowledge & promote the free exchange of ideas. Doesn’t that sound like an excellent use of a library?

The weirdest thing about this is that I heard the news via Ozzie Guillen’s Twitter feed.  I’ve decided that I can get all the news I need from Ozzie Guillen.  I want Ozzie doing the news on NPR for Morning Edition.  I want Ozzie doing BBC World late night broadcasts.  Imagine Ozzie Guillen on the Daily Show.

It’s blowing your mind.

Over at Vocalo blog, they’re talking about their F*ck It lists.  I think the * is supposed to be a u.  (I’m surprised that a site affiliated with NPR would make that kind of typo.)  So I think it’s supposed to read “Fuck It”.  Like the opposite of “Don’t Fuck It”?  I don’t know, I’m not a journalist.

Anyway, people seem to be listing things that they will never do.  Lots of people will never run a marathon.  Lots of people will never turn off their Caps Lock key.  Lots of people will never use spell check.

There’s got to be a drinking game in here, right?  Take a drink for everything you might someday consider doing?  For example, Ursula from comment #16 “will NOT dive into the bottle as a means of escape!”  I’ll probably do that someday, so I’d take a drink.

Swirly in comment #45  will never “SLEEP ON A COUCH”.  What the hell is wrong with you, Swirly?  Sleeping on couches is the shit.  Sometimes, I drive through alleys looking for couches just so I can take a nap outside.  And then I dive into the bottle as a means of escape.

subWOW in comment #52 will never RUN.  You’ll RUN if I’m chasing you with a knife because you’re trying to bogart my napping couch, subWOW.  Oh yes you will.

Here’s my F*ck It List of things I will never do:

1. Punch a lion in the face.
2. Make out with Mayor McCheese.
3. Pull a locomotive engine with my teeth.
4. Wear overalls.
5. Learn from my mistakes.

If you’d do any of these things, go ahead & drink.  If you’re right now in the boxing ring with a lion, or if you’ve got Mayor McCheese’s tongue in your mouth, go ahead & finish the bottle.  I think you’ve earned it.

If you’re going to pick a fight, make sure it’s with a group of people who lack the muscle tone to inflict any real injury.  This, combined with a disproportionate sense of importance, make Brooklyn & Chicago hipsters an excellent target.

So bravo to you, Allyson, for sparking an outrage that’s filling the void now that Pitchfork & Lollapalooza are over.